So that dinner! What a false friend that evil egg turned out to be! As we sat supping and sipping he (Rex Ovum Mundi) was plotting and scheming the whole dang time!
Just before the gong was sounded to mark the end of the meal, the Egg King raised his voice and said: ANDY LAM! You are the most fantastic person to have ever lived on this planet in all its long history! (I blushed but had to agree.) As a sign of my esteem and desire for a great and long lasting friendship, I a gift to share with you. (I was so excited! A gift from a royal egg had to be something special!) First though, I must apologize for my behavior. It was wrong of me to have barged in here like a bull into a shop filled with very breakable knick knacks made of fragile ceramics. (I looked around the room and was happy to see none of my priceless gew gaws had been broken or damaged!) Sometimes I get ahead of myself and get so excited I act recklessly, that was the case tonight. (I had to admit, I have acted recklessly on one or two occasions myself!) To seal our friendship, I propose a toast with the most fantastic draught you’ve ever tasted, an elixir for fabled you will not believe it. (He leaned in close to whisper so only I could hear as a tiny crystal decanter rose up from a secret compartment on his egg cup throne!) This decanter holds the last drops of cider made from the apple that Eve tasted in the Garden of Eden! (I was stunned into flabbergasted silence!) I would share it with you but there really isn’t enough for two and I would rather give these two tiny drops to you as a sign of my respect. I ask though that you share one of you finest drinks with me to be fair! (I called one of my attendants and sent her whisking away to get a bottle of peach schnapps that I’d been saving for a special occasion. The Egg King looked pleased when the dusty bottle was brought to the table.)
 |
| A photograph of Adam and Eve. I drank the last two drops of the cider made from that apple! |
I poured a tiny dribble of the peachy booze into a tiny cup for my tiny royal guest. He passed me the tiny bottle with the two tiny drops of cider from the Garden of Eden. Cheers my friend, said the Egg and I sucked down the greatest and oldest liquor of the planet earth!
Then everything went black!
With more to tell, but still nursing a hangover, I am . . .
ANDY LAM!
Oh, no, Andy -- the rotter egg may have tricked you, he may indeed have tricked you -- we trust you and you trusted him but he tricked you -- oh me oh my -- what can you do, what can we do
ReplyDeleteThe trick was worth the treat! Think about it - those two drops of sigh, der, well they are from the BIBLE times along timey ago. Back before the pirouettes were billed to the Egyptians by the Oh Oh, the Israelites. Those people had to get out of bed, just for the work to be down, oh, oh, the Israelites. And me, ANDY LAM, bringing a tiny flask to my lips, tasted the fruit of that garden that gave us all the sin that stains our soul from the Mormon we are bored! Out we pop, all small-limbed and slimy and that dark stain (not the stain of Cain, or Able) is upon us. Be me, ANDY LAM, I sipped that sweet sauce of the knowledge of all and in that sip, even though the Egg Bested Me, I was the one and only to have that stain remover in my mouth. That knowingness that no others have had was there for me, ANDY LAM and it was, is and ever shall be a miracle that only I will be able to experience. So, you think the egg tricked me? Think again!
ReplyDelete